It's so hard to be ikhlas. I have to take a deep breath every time I realise that Papi will not be there anymore. He loved being home waiting for all his kids to come then hugging them with tears in his eyes. But there were also times when Papi was so distant, perhaps he missed Kakek and his friends who had been long gone. He would then see them waving at him. He is in much better place now, reunited with Kakek and Nenek again.